satanic leaf-tailed gecko
a legend in elegance, you, satanic leaf-tailed gecko, earn every bit of respect your name deserves, by plastering your horrible, tiny body to the small, dying tree trunks of your lichen-covered, swamp-ridden natural habitat. your grace and power surpass definition, in much the same way that your annoying, high-pitched laugh eliminates erections and kills the buzz at each office party you crash.
this year raises new possibilities for romance and adventure as the coming months unfold ahead of you, similar to the way in which you raise your grotesque and terrible head with its oversized, dilated pupils, to shriek abruptly each time you are disturbed from your face-down sleeping position. so full speed ahead, satanic leaf-tailed gecko, this is a year of promise for you.
satanic leaf-tailed gecko, 2016
30 x 40 cm. charcoal, pen and ink
ranging from the grotesque to the pathetic, the twelve animals in this horoscope provide a set of options slightly slimmer than the current zodiac animals.
it is hoped, by being confronted with unexpected — even insulting — predictions, the participant is prepared for the worst but continues to hope for the best in the new lunar year.